Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
