I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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