One girl and one boy is just not enough.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
