went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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