i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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