I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
