sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
