we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
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