his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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