it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
