Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Alive.
So much puke
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
