Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I am midnight drunk by noon
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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