Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
