I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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