DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
My pussy is not your playground.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
dude. I can hear the air.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
