Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
