Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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