You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
