Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize