Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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