I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
