No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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