the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
We don't watch enough power rangers
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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