i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
