I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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