No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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