Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize