Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
So much Jack, so little girl.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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