Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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