The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
