Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
