Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
