I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
