Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
