Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
