Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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