; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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