She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
