the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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