No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
She's just so happy...and so naked.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
