I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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