i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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