I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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