why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
