Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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