She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Randomize
