Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
we're making bets on your personal life
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize