Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
