I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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