So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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